登機箱

明日一早就要出發到機場，參加在夏威夷的研討會。拿出衣櫃中的登機箱，準備將些衣物收拾入內。拉開箱子，一股香氣撲鼻而來。這是上個月到倫敦開會時，在當地商場買的香皂所遺留的氣味，沒想到會持續到現在。這個登機箱，買不到三年的時間，卻已經有些斑駁。我是拖著它，到不少城市開會或旅遊，然後又回到這裡，一個我所見過最糟糕的地方。

History Repeats Itself

History repeats, with short interval this time. When I open the door and my arms to her, she takes it for granted. One day she evaporated from my life without any word. I waited and asked three times. The first text message is “hello”; the second one is “long time no see. How are you doing?” and the last one is “Could you tell why?” No answer still.

Tradition in Modern

This was the first I visited Tokyo. Before I though Tokyo could be another New York City, packed with skyscrapers, people and cars. This visit proved I was wrong. 

Skytree, a tower more appealing to the young than Tokyo Tower.

Webpage

Today I saw a photo taken on main campus posted on NC State’s facebook page. The scene in that photo was leaves in green, red and yellow colors, so dynamic. I felt guilty for having not paid a visit on the university’s website for more than one month. While I was browsing what new souvenir is available in the bookstore, I received a message from the Suzhou girl asking when I can visit Suzhou.

“Maybe mid-January, but I am not in a good mood.” I wanted to avoid making any promise.

“Do you still care about the one who does not care about you? Christmas?” she asked.

“You are right. Maybe January 1^st.” I still wanted to skip any promise.

“Christmas is more romantic.” I thought I understand what she means. I should have told the Suzhou girl that Christmas is not a romantic day. I am in trouble because I could not resist her request and I want to date another girl recently.

This afternoon, I just sent an email to a student we just met yesterday to ask where I can have a good time in this shitty city. At the end of the meeting she said I can invite her to watch the movie. I had good impression on her in our first chat in my office so I would like to take advantage of this opportunity for forgetting my advisee. But I found I still had feeling on her.

On Monday, after class I met her in the coffee shop, the only real one in this city. She explained why she didn’t come to see me for over one month. Although she had lost my trust, my heart melted when looking at her. We told a lot regarding with her papers, my job, the plan for my future career and something I couldn’t remember.

“Are you still going to the conference in New York?” she asked.

“Yes, I will.” I said.

“Then my visa…”

“I will let the assistant to ask that for you.” I thought I was fooled again by her face and voice.

They said she is taking advantage of me, but I am not a righteous man either.

棋子

又是一個雨天。研究室的氣氛仍然如此沉悶。

他告訴我這件謠言。只是謠言，但對照這學期的情況，我選擇相信了。不能否認，有忌妒的成份，但更多的是不解與氣憤。

No Holiday

Today is so called "Holiday" for people in this country. To me, today is a weekday. I entered the office as usual, and didnít work much as usual. Around 8:30 pm I went back to the apartment. It was locked at 11:00 pm. People can't get in and go out, just like a jail. 

Tough Start

I had been returning to my works for a week. Today is the date of the first seminar. I was about 5 minutes late, but it took a while to catch up the topic. The slides projected on the screen were yellow, and the slides were not careful made, especially the tables with some words in strange shapes. Later we were informed this was a job market talk. Because this topic is not my field, I didn’t bother to any comment unless I was in the recruiting committee.

After the seminar, just like it used to be, with the guest we went to the on-campus hotel for a dinner. Although there were so many deluxe dishes, the tastes were never amazing. Each dish was either salty or spicy. I found most of my energy had run out while eating and listening to what they were talking. The dinner lasted two hours; however, I felt it was like lasting three hours or longer.

It was 8:30 pm when I came back to the office on old campus. I continued to find a way to extract a variable from a data file. I had spent a few hours today trying Stata and R. No solution found. Finally I came back to MatLab, the one I haven’t used for one year. Because of wasting so much time on the awful internet, it was 10:00 pm when I figured out the way and installed software necessary for running MatLab. Due to the lack of both intellectual and physical proficiency, this was the first time I thought I am getting old.

This was just the first week. It can be expected that there are more difficulties on the way. What else can I do other than praying?