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Today I saw a photo taken on main campus posted on NC State’s facebook page. The scene in that photo was leaves in green, red and yellow colors, so dynamic. I felt guilty for having not paid a visit on the university’s website for more than one month. While I was browsing what new souvenir is available in the bookstore, I received a message from the Suzhou girl asking when I can visit Suzhou.

“Maybe mid-January, but I am not in a good mood.” I wanted to avoid making any promise.

“Do you still care about the one who does not care about you? Christmas?” she asked.

“You are right. Maybe January 1^st.” I still wanted to skip any promise.

“Christmas is more romantic.” I thought I understand what she means. I should have told the Suzhou girl that Christmas is not a romantic day. I am in trouble because I could not resist her request and I want to date another girl recently.

This afternoon, I just sent an email to a student we just met yesterday to ask where I can have a good time in this shitty city. At the end of the meeting she said I can invite her to watch the movie. I had good impression on her in our first chat in my office so I would like to take advantage of this opportunity for forgetting my advisee. But I found I still had feeling on her.

On Monday, after class I met her in the coffee shop, the only real one in this city. She explained why she didn’t come to see me for over one month. Although she had lost my trust, my heart melted when looking at her. We told a lot regarding with her papers, my job, the plan for my future career and something I couldn’t remember.

“Are you still going to the conference in New York?” she asked.

“Yes, I will.” I said.

“Then my visa…”

“I will let the assistant to ask that for you.” I thought I was fooled again by her face and voice.

They said she is taking advantage of me, but I am not a righteous man either.